


Honey Drops and Pink Diamonds

by nachttour



Series: The Dad Who Lived [2]
Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: AU, M/M, Multi, manfeelings, rarepair, tentabulge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-14
Updated: 2012-10-14
Packaged: 2017-11-16 07:43:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/537126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nachttour/pseuds/nachttour
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'Sequel' to Young Things, set in the same universe.  Focused on John and Karkat's relationship with each other and Sollux. Also, beware darlings. This is a kissing movie.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Honey Drops and Pink Diamonds

**Author's Note:**

  * For [JumpingJackFlash](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JumpingJackFlash/gifts).



Honey Drops and Pink Diamonds

_nachttour 2012_

 

 

“Dude your junk just stole my glasses!”

 

John looked up the length of now-obscured boy sprawled out along his bed. The world turned into soft shapes and impressionistic colors without his eye-wear. Smoothing his hands up over the planes of Sollux's hips and brushing his thumbs along the frightening markers of his bones, he leaned his cheek against his thigh and pressed a quiet kiss against heated gray skin. Troll hearts had an entirely different cadence, and feeling the tempo change during arousal fascinated him. Somewhere in the leg under him there was an artery shouting all of Sollux's secrets, even while his expression remained somewhat neutral. Tracking the gentle coils and twists of the appendage, John grinned. “Think that it'll give 'em back?” He leaned forward, drawing his tongue slowly along the underside of Sollux's bulge; having come forward in its travels, glasses still securely in its grasp, to pap him on the nose. The sheets whispered as Sollux's toes curled against them. Nails gently bit into John's scalp where one of his hands twined in his hair. “Maybe if I treat it really nice, it'll be nice to me.”

 

“'th not thentient.” Sollux looked really cute when he was flustered, a buttery warm flush highlighting his cheeks and chest. When he was calm, when he was happy, both conditions rare and elusive – Sollux did not mind whether or not his fangs were showing. John could see their exaggerated points, and the contrast of shape against his soft, dark lips made his stomach do a funny little twist. At the moment Sollux's mouth hung open at a soft circle, throat moving slightly in the rhythmic thrums he vocalized when touched. “At leatht I hope not. Would be a very bad thituation if that were the cathe.”

 

Carefully extracting his glasses, John chuckled. To keep it occupied he gently coerced the tip to curl around his fingers, kissing and licking it; giggling to himself as the organ attempted to slide itself into his mouth, shooing it away with a soft puff of air. Their first attempt with oral sex had ended up with John gagging violently and suffering a coughing fit when the tentacle-like appendage sought to travel down his throat. Sollux whined softly, scrunching his eyes closed. “I kinda like that, but I kinda don't. Pleathe dethide what it ith that you are doing with my thoft partth John. There is altho a nook for your peruthal.”

 

John grinned, reaching with his free hand to gently run his fore-finger over the slick space Sollux suggested, flirting with the deeper parts without actually entering them. The skin was supple, warm, slippery, and begged to be further explored. Releasing the tip of his bulge and gently guiding it to coil against Sollux's abdomen John trapped it under his cupped hand, running his thumb over the base in time with his ministrations. “Sorry, I don't mean to mess around, but I think you're really gorgeous, you know? And it's so different. Sexy. But different.”

 

Pressing his hips up in an attempt to get John's digits where he wanted them, Sollux sighed at him in frustration. “Perhapth comparative biology netht time? It ith really clother to orgathm time. Orgathm time ith now, in fact.”

 

John slid the first finger in slowly, gently wiggling it and greeting the mini-structures inside that swirled and squirmed to make his acquaintance and guide him deeper. Impishly he licked a little bit of the slickness off of his knuckle where it brushed one of Sollux's thighs and left a wet dab. Giving his bulge a soft squeeze, John smiled as Sollux thrummed dropping his knees open wider to allow better access. Lights gently danced around his face like fireflies, little sparks flaring to life to then flicker out just as fast as they appeared. Initially troll biology had been the stuff of 4chan legend, or hentai. Before the game and the if someone had told him with a straight face that tentacle-reproductive organs were real he would have sent them a cleverly concealed link to goat.se and gone about his daily life. Instead, he had come to the present wherein he lavished loving attention onto an anatomically fantastical boy who was not even technically his matespirit. Carefully adding a second finger and finding a sedate rhythm he considered how they had arrived at this point, and more importantly when he would have to de-capitchalog a bucket. Sollux draped a knee over his shoulder and left him to his thoughts.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Sollux was not someone that John initially figured he would be close to. He was not one of the trolls that had contacted them pre-game. With a demeanor simultaneously standoffish, quiet, strange, and often preoccupied he was not easy to read. Sometimes social; mostly the gold blooded troll withdrew even when staying at their house rather than the lab or at Dave's. John often found him settled into a window or a small space, the look on his face miles away and tense, the line of his body like a spring that had been coiled too tight and was threatening to snap. Karkat explained to him once that similar to Vriska he was a sensitive, but unlike her, his powers ranged more toward movement and kinetics than influence and manipulation. Unlike her eightfold vision, which John really had not understood anyway, Sollux suffered under vision twofold. That double-vision also informed some of his odd quirks, including all of the bifurcating he did. When asked to break it down for the simple kids, Karkat had rolled his eyes and gone on to tell John that Sollux heard a lot of dying people all the time and that it made him grumpy. While the fact was depressing, it was good enough for John and he had left the subject alone as it obviously made Karkat uncomfortable.

 

Often when Sollux visited, he and Karkat or a collection of them worked on game-problems. When not occupied with strategy the young man in question coded away at some project or another, or designed software from what John could tell. Over the years as he adapted to his blindness they had rigged a system with his bees, wherein one would hover over the screen and hum to him, presumably reading whatever he typed. When one got tired, another of a number of waiting fellows would take its place. As far as accessibility software went, John had to admit the bees were wickedly cool.

 

When he was much younger, the fact that Karkat had a kismesis was intimidating and frightening. Sometimes they would kiss so hard they both bruised, livid and dark welts appearing on lips and necks. Given how hard it was to bruise Karkat on his own, (hint: it took hammers) the implications made him nervous. John frequently found teeth and claw-marks over the terrain of Karkat's body, in addition to hickeys, burns and the occasional concussion. At first fear overrode the sense of jealousy that he felt about someone else touching the person that was so important to him. Little by little though, the jealousy gained in strength. John had dithered about it, not wanting to upset Karkat and his quadrants. Always intuitive, Karkat had sat him awkwardly down on the couch and they had engaged in the world's most painful and stilted conversation regarding boundaries and needs. At the end of it they had both blushed and hugged and agreed not to talk about it to anyone that had not been present for the conversation in question.

 

A few good things did come from that talk though; an understanding of what kismessitude was to Karkat, and how it framed his needs as well as how it served Sollux's needs. It also convinced him that blackrom was not anything that he would be good at. Unlike Dave who was sort of a natural and had been strifing from the time he could walk, John came from a peaceful household. The most violent thing that he and Dad engaged in were contact sports.

 

It took sitting with Gamzee and talking about it for the reality of the situation to fully settle in. The high-blooded troll had calmly explained that violence was inherent. Much as it was in his father's nature and his own to be gentle and playful, it was in the nature of trolls to be cruel. They did not feel comfortable without shredding, biting, clawing, and strife. While John could provide some of those things, his body did not stand up as well to abuse. Some pain, he was slowly coming to find, had a delicious edge. Having God-tiered he healed quickly. Still, his skin was thinner and softer than theirs. It was too easy to disembowel when the intent was a firm grip. One afternoon during a hurried attempt to get his pants down Karkat had accidentally opened a gash down his side so deep that he had felt dizzy from blood loss. The resulting hooplah in retrospect was funny; but a new couch had to be alchemized. Given how merciless he and Karkat could be in bed one of those deaths might register as 'just'. Death by snu-snu was a good joke, not how John wished to depart the mortal coil.

 

Dave confirmed Gamzee's explaination, explaining how his rad flushed romance occasionally drifted black. Tererzi and he frequently vacillated between several quadrants. Generally they claimed to be flushed, sometimes pale, other times black. Sollux part-timed in her flushed quadrant as well, but he and Dave did not always coexist effectively. Something about Dave's incessant need to pick coupled with Sollux's fluctuating moods was a deadly mix. During these times Sollux appeared in Chez Egbert.

 

Over time, honeycomb started appearing in the study and eventually Dad and John relinquished the area entirely to Sollux and his odd hive computers. The humming of the bees was soothing, if intimidating. The pair of them made their first connection in the server room, as it had been dubbed.

 

* * *

 

Everyone had left for the evening. Dad had followed Gamzee to the LOTAM, Karkat was out working with the group at the lab. John entered the house, gently ushering a few of the small imps out of the way and absentmindedly petting a stray salamander on the head. Some of the consorts followed him around. It was a little weird, but if it made them happy he saw no harm in letting them come. To his knowledge Rose also had a posse.

 

Grabbing an egg-salad sandwich out of the fridge he headed upstairs toward his room. The server room was open and there were odd lights flashing inside of it. Having no previous experience with that particular frequency of blinks he stuck his head around the doorjamb, mindful of bees in the crack of the door. The accidental assassination of one of them had triggered an angry swarm chasing him down the stairs a few weeks earlier.

 

Tucked into one of the large armchairs, knees pulled up and hunched over them, Sollux tapped at his keyboard, brow furrowed down into a glower. The working bee buzzed along the screen only to quickly stop and back up, stop and back up. Sollux muttered quietly to himself, worrying at his bottom lip with his sizable incisors. Several tablets lay strewn around, scribbled Alternian notes at crazy angles displaying on all of them in varying states of completion. Karkat had warned him about Sollux's work-benders before but John had never been a witness to one.

 

Rapping his knuckles on the door so that he could avoid a face-full of lasers, John cleared his throat. “Uhm, hey. I didn't know you were home. Can I help with anything?”

 

Sollux's fingers remained on the keys and he hummed at his cursor, tabbing over into a second window to answer a pesterchum message. The seconds dragged out and John began to wonder if Sollux had heard him over the sound of the bees. Feeling a jolt of inspiration, he dug out his pda and sent what he assumed to be the correct pesterhandle a quick message. It was the one that matched Sollux's color on Karkat's laptop.

 

EB: Hey. I'm home. Do you need anything? You've kinda got a light show going on up here.

 

At his computer, Sollux snorted. “'th nothing. I am fine. Thanth for the conthern. How did you get my handle?” A few bees perched drowsily on his double-horns, wings glittering and catching the dim lighting of his monitors.

 

John leaned against the wall, watching the bees making geometric air-patterns. “ I looked over Karkat's shoulder when he's typing at you. Guessing at the color of your text it's you.” Satisfied, Sollux returned to his coding and John felt a profound sense of dismissal. Taking his sandwich, John walked a few doors down to hang out in his room and relax.

 

The dull thud a few hours later got him back out of his room post-haste and back into the server room. Over the years (sweeps?) they had all become protectively-close from their shared proximity. Any one member of the team getting hurt or in danger was not an option. In particular, Karkat worried about Sollux, who had not God-tiered and had no dreamself left to fall back on should something awful happen. Carefully dodging around the swarming bees and bumping into a few things in the low-light, John settled down onto his knees next to Sollux who had curled up on himself and was sitting with his back to his desk, keyboard on the floor and presumably the culprit of the noise.

 

“Hey.” Sollux did not look up, eyes scrunched closed behind his glasses. “Hey. Sollux.” The bees droned around them, discordant. John poked at a bit of honeycomb on the floor, unsure of how to proceed.

 

Karkat was easy to navigate around. There was a lot of fury in him, but beneath it was an icky patch of shaky self-esteem. Many times the anger was directed inwardly, rather than outwardly as it might at first seem-- yelling was to Karkat as breathing was to most others. John got him, especially after all of these years, and the oil slicks of rage and doubt he could navigate. Sollux was an enigma. Still, his matespirit's kismesis seemed to have blue-screened on the floor of their house. Idly, John wondered if Sollux had a moirail that he could call. Slipping the pda out again, he pinged Terezi.

 

EB: Oi. Serious question time.

 

GC: SHOOT COWBOY

 

EB: Captor. There's something up with him. Does he have a moirail?

 

GC: WH4T3V3RS UP PROB4BLY W1LL P4SS H1S MOODS FLUX PR3TTY W1LDLY YOU G3TT1NG TH3 D3L1C1OUS BLU3B3RRY/R4SPB3RRY L1GHT SHOW Y3T

 

EB: Yeah...

 

GC: M1GR41N3 S33 1F YOU C4N G3T H1M TO G3T UP 4ND GO 4ND L4Y DOWN FOR 4 WH1L3 YOU M4Y OR M4Y NOT G3T W4T3R 1NTO H1M M1GHT H3LP OTH3RW1S3 TH3R3S NOTH1NG FOR 1T H3S JUST 4S PR1CKLY 4S K4R4T

 

EB: Oh. Crap. Okay.

 

Slipping the device back into his pocket, John settled against the opposite side of the desk, glancing edgewise at Sollux. “If you were Karkat, 'd just throw you over my shoulder and we would go watch a movie. But that kinda doesn't work for you, huh?”

 

Sollux tilted his head in John's direction, the red and blue lights pulsing around his head. “Not tho much. Lacking eyeth, talent, and motht other functionth needed for living.”

 

Pursing his lips, John smiled. “Maybe come down with me for a while and keep me company? I've got an audiobook I've been listening to while I work through my coding books and it's pretty good. There's something that doesn't require life skills or eyes.”

 

Sollux shuffled his feet out slowly in front of him, and John could see the points on his toe claws flex as they glided along the carpet. “Coding bookth? What are you learning?”

 

They were making headway. John carefully rose to his feet, reaching down and quietly slipping his hands through Sollux's more slender ones, tugging upward. “Y'know, the name escapes me. C'mon down and you call tell me what I should be learning instead.” Slowly Sollux's fingers contracted, curling around John's hands as he worked his way up into a standing position.

 

* * *

 

John sat in front of his laptop, as bemused as he was frustrated, book open to one side of him and Sollux on his side of the couch on the other. “What the hell do you mean? The book says right here-”

 

Sollux smacked at his knee lightly, shaking his head. “The book was written with three thweep oldth in mind, obviouthly. Do what I thay, it workth better. I did not know that it was pothible for someone to be worth at code than KK.”

 

“You do realize that you're having me code in Alternian. I only got a very basic grasp of it a little while ago and now I'm doing computers in it. Give me a break!” John grumbled, but smiled while he did so. Sollux, in an acerbic way was an all right teacher. Lacking the temperament or the patience to actually teach, he did know his shit.

 

Sollux left his hand where it had come to land on John's knee, shaking his head. “If you are going to make ethcuthes, jutht thtop doing it. Bitching doethn't work on uth. My perthonal thtock of thympathy wath depleted in my wigglerhood.” Rolling his eyes John kept at it until the line was finished and then he grinned as he tested it. “Hey. No errors. Holy crap!”

 

Sollux nodded sagely. “Lithten to the mathter.” In the background, the audiobook needed attention on the player. John picked up the controller, but reconsidered. “We've been talking about code this time, did you want me to rewind or turn something else on?”

 

The golden troll shook his head minutely. “I've been lithtening while we talk. I like this thtory. It'th not too thappy, but there ith action. We can lithten for a while longer.” Privately John was impressed – the code took up all of his attention and he had no idea what had just transpired. “You got it.”

 

* * *

 

The light did not change in the house the way that it did when he was planet-bound. It was one of the subtleties to the game that crept up on John and distressed him. Time moved in a different manner without that frame of reference. Instead it was measured in hunger, in how long it took injuries to close, the movement of the consorts and the other inhabitants of the house. If he looked at one more line of code, he was going to start screaming. Closing his laptop with great flourish, John set it down on top of his abandoned book and sprawled, arm inadvertently coming down on top of Sollux's. The troll looked appreciably more relaxed, the red and blue lights around his head down to a glitter and his eyes closed behind his tinted lenses. Following an impulse he slid his hand through Sollux's, drawing a thumb along the inside of his palm in a tight little circle. “Thank you for your help. I was lost.”

 

“It wath obviouth.” Sollux murmured, making no attempt to retrieve his hand. “I am quite graciouth. Let no one tell you otherwithe.” The mood was chill and very different from what he had come to expect when around him, so John pressed just a little. “How's your head doing?”

 

Sollux smiled, his fangs peeking out. “I can hear the wind.”

 

Checking quickly to make sure that he was not moving the breeze around, and that no windows were left open, he blinked in consternation. “Ah.”

 

“When we are in contact. All I can hear ith the wind,” Sollux continued in way of explanation. It clicked, what Karkat had told him about Sollux being psychic and hearing voices. “Oh, well then! You're welcome to touch me whenever you like. I mean if you like hearing the Breeze, that is.”

 

Sollux turned toward him, head tilted inquisitively.“Jutht like that. You mean it don't you?”

 

John snorted through a laugh. “Yeah. Dude, I don't say things that I don't mean. I play tricks sometimes, but I'll always tell you. And I don't joke about being nice. My Dad raised a good kid.”

Regarding him, Sollux shifted, settling his legs across John's lap, booting the laptop out of the way and settling in to the corner of the couch, pulling out one of his smaller devices to work on.

 

* * *

 

Karkat shoved the laptop the rest of the way off of the couch, ignoring John's protest and pinched at the soles of Sollux's feet, finding a comfortable place. “You two are sure snuggly. Did you eat something that Gamzee made? It's not safe you know.”

 

John turned and stole a kiss, cutting Karkat off. “Dude's cupcakes are pretty legit. As long as they don't taste like chemicals. We were listening to the audio book you torrented for me. It's also legit. The legitimacy of today has been fairly massive.”

 

Karkat nuzzled in close briefly, bonking foreheads with John, while slowly digging his nails into Sollux's ankle. “Of course it is. You never listen to me when I present you with greatness.” Sollux flexed his toes, scraping the largest one along the inside of Karkat's wrist, leaving an angry dark line on the skin. John smiled, closing his eyes and feeling very settled. To his left, Sollux was slightly cooler and a longer body shape, and on his right Karkat was a warm and solid presence. Everything felt balanced. Opening his eyes, he found Karkat watching him with a funny expression. His pda buzzed and he pulled it out.

 

CG: YOU AND I NEED TO TALK ABOUT SOMETHING A WHILE LATER. GO MAKE DINNER?

 

EB: You got it. Not something we can talk about in front of Sol?

 

CG: NOT SURE. DISCRESSION MIGHT BE THE MOST VALIANT OPTION IN THIS SITUATION. I DON'T WANT TO DEAL WITH A SHITFIT IF I AM WRONG. WHICH IS RARELY. BUT IT DOES HAPPEN.

 

EB: Ffft. Talk about often wrong. But no, 's fine. We'll talk after dinner. I'm thinking pasta?

 

CG: MAKE IT SO. I KNOW YOU'RE TIRED OF ALTERNIAN

 

EB: Not tired per se. I just literally get sick of eating it after a while. Some of the stuff you put in there is weird.

 

CG: WE WILL REFINE YOUR PALETTE YET. I'M 'BOUT TO BITE MY PERSONAL LASER LIGHT SHOW IN A SECOND, SO UNLESS YOU'RE STAYING...

 

EB: Oh geez! I'm going already. <3

 

CG: <3

 

John carefully extracted himself from the troll-pile, releasing Sollux's hand reluctantly. “I'm going to start dinner I think. The time is now.” Getting a grunt of assent from the corner of the couch, John winked a Karkat before heading into the kitchen and turning on the player with his ipod anchored to it. Karkat was welcome to get as frisky as he liked, but he was going to be doing it to 'Welcome to the Jungle'. When he heard an angry snarl at the “NA NA NA NA NA” he turned the heat up a bit on the water-pot.

 

“ehehe”

 

* * *

 

Bringing up a cup of tea for Karkat, John settled down on one side of his bed. Settled on a side table, the beverages he ascended with steamed merrily. “So tell me darling, all of the things that are on your mind.”

 

“You are a strange, strange person.” Karkat reclined on his favorite side of the bed, pillows jammed up and around him, fiddling on a laptop while he waited. Snapping he lid closed succinctly he addressed John and what was on his mind. “We're going to talk about Captor. You are a smart boy and I figured that the preamble wouldn't be necessary. He's my best friend and I care for him deeply. If I were going to be pale-infidelitous for anyone it would probably be him. That is how hard I pity him. So.”

 

John reached across the space between them, gently poking at a little triangle of exposed gray skin where Karkat's shirt had hiked up. “So. You have the intense feelings for Sollux. I could tell that. He's your bro. And your Spade. You feel intense about most things, in fact. Intensity is your middle name. Mine is danger. We make a good pair.”

 

Karkat wiggled, jamming his shirt down and capturing the offending hand in his own, lacing their fingers. John loved it when he did that, the texture of Karkat's skin was very different from his own. Karkat's palms were rougher. Every morning he still did forms with his sickles before starting on the rest of his tasks. At this point it was like watching a dancer go through base-forms before flying through a choreography. Also, seeing the muscles work in Karkat's back as he stretched and bent did funny things to him. John's own skin was starting to speak to the fact that he was deadly-accurate with most types of hammers. The callouses he was grateful for, as they softened the blow of said hammers. Their hands told their stories—they were warriors. Karkat by necessity, and John in a way by choice.

 

Forcing himself back to the matter at hand and away from his shameless adoration of his lover's digits, John grinned. “I know these things about Sollux and I don't have any beef with him. You don't need to worry. I'm not jealous anymore. We talked it out a year or so ago remember? 'since then I've been working on it. It's cool.”

 

Karkat's face scrunched up in one of his cute, subtle smiles. “I know that. I am... very proud of you for getting over your human hangups. There's something else that you might not be aware of.”

 

Leaning forward on his elbows, John waited. “Mmm?”

 

Tapping his fingers over the top of the laptop, Karkat wrestled with his thought a moment. “Are you pale for Sollux? Because you are human and strange and you might not understand how you're acting. But it is quite pale. ”

 

Stretching out long on the bed John did his best superman impersonation, fingers flexed outward and toes pointed. “How so? I don't quite understand where this question is coming from? I feel nice toward Sollux, certainly. I'm not going to be snarly and bitchy at him.” The best option was to ask when cultural confusion arose, otherwise it just got progressively more heinous.

 

Karkat snorted at him. “Am I not speaking clearly enough? Are you -pale- for him? Like I am with Gamzee. Do you want to hug Sollux and give him nice things and tell him he is beautiful and worthwhile?”

 

Taking the question with its intended weight, John let the silence hang between them as he pulled at a loose thread on the comforter. The pale quadrant was a romantic relationship to trolls, and a serious commitment. John could comfortably own the fact that Karkat was in love with Gamzee on some level. It was simply not a level that involved pants-off time, instead it more of a caring and safe space that they carved out for one-another. The next logical question then, was if John wanted to tuck the bundle of angles and lasers under his chin and carve out a safe space in the dark for him.

 

Maybe.

 

No. That was a lot of responsibility and emotion to undertake and his relationship with Karkat was intense enough.

 

Yes. Sollux deserved a friend. He deserved a fucking friend and to feel like he was worth something and to have someone who told him that he was awesome out loud. He deserved to be able to believe that someone when they said he was valuable and wanted. John was fairly sure there was no one like that in his life at the moment. In his conversations with Karkat someone named Aradia had come up, and she might have been that person at one point; but Aradia was dead.

 

On the surface he was hoping to be human-friends with Sollux, make him feel welcome and comfortable. Dave was already his best-bro and the human equivalent of pale. Then again, they were all alone in this, and Sollux seemed to very visibly lack an anchor. With a personality as vibrant as his, an anchor was probably a good idea so he did not finish his acrobatic flip off the handle and fold in on himself. Then again, who wanted to be a project? John frowned, staring down Liv Tyler as if she withheld the answers. Was it fair to want to be friends with Sollux just because he was lacking a friend in the house? Maybe he had friends out in the lab and with the rest of the group. Certainly there was more to the universe than just their family. This was all too complicated.

 

Bringing his attention back to the present he found Karkat very patiently tapping a rhythm on his nose with a forefinger. “Medium to John Egbert. Are you receiving? Medium to John Eg-” Grinning when John bit his finger softly, he arched a brow at him. “Did I ask you the wrong thing? You went all quiet and I began to worry if your brain broke a little. I know we already ask it to do a lot...”

 

John increased the pressure on the digit in his mouth incrementally before letting it go. “I was thinking before I spoke. Dad's always on me to actually consider what I say before I say it. Says it's part of being a gentleman and crap like that.” Nuzzling his face into his pillow, John returned his attention to the posters on his walls, only to arrive at the thought that he should hang up some new posters. Maybe a couple from the troll movies. They were pretty neat even though the titles were thirteen years long.

 

“I think... I kinda might be pale for Sollux. How do you feel about that?” It had taken a few really bad fights for them both to learn to structure their relationship discussions with 'how do you feel about that', rather than asking or denying permission automatically. Chancing a look sideways, John was heartened to find Karkat grinning.

 

“ 'm okay with it. If this had gone down when we were younger, hell no. But...I want Captor to be happy. And you're kind of the master of happiness. As long as you're okay sharing him with Terezi and Strider, we're set to board the happiness multi-person coal-powered transportation device. The closer we come to getting his quadrants balanced, the easier it is.”

 

John inwardly doubted the validity of basing 'okay' on romantic relationships, but it was an issue that he and Karkat diverged on slightly. Rubbing his eyes with the heels of his palms, a bit amused at the convoluted nature of the relationship he was proposing he knew how he felt before he said it. “I'm not bothered by Dave or Terezi, will I bother them?”

 

Karkat reached over, resting the earlier-bitten finger over John's mouth. “Hold please, I'm running logistics now.” John left him to pesterchum, once again digging his incisor into the pad of Karkat's finger and listening to his soft thrum of pleasure.

 

* * *

 

Given free reign to snuggle Sollux at any time of the day, John was left to the question of whether or not the object of his now-legal affection wished to be snuggled at all. Watching him more closely John sought to develop an understanding of the person that he proposed to be a diamond to.

 

Sollux was an introvert, furiously intelligent, somewhat shy, and possessed a whip-sharp sense of sarcasm. John enjoyed the last – it was pleasant to be able to sass someone and receive sass back on the level of Dave without the need to take it to eleven. How to approach that combination of personality traits was the challenge. John understood that he was a lot to handle at any given time, all energy and light and laughter. For the quieter personalities it could be a bit much all at once. So he would approach quietly to start with and let the shine out in increments.

 

Thursdays were unofficial 'hang out and do coding stuff in the server room' days. Depending on the day, Sollux would be chatting and coding and surfing the memos and working on a variety of things. Other days Sollux would be staring down the monitor like it had insulted his entire group of friends and associates and John could not distract him without a fight. The trick to understanding the right course of action was determining what kind of a day it was going to be.

 

This day was going to be a hard day; Sollux's brows were knotted down into a harsh line over the empty spaces where his eyes had burnt out. His mouth had locked itself into a grim pout and he worried at his bottom-lip with one of his smaller fangs. It was sad to see his mouth on bad stretches, little patches of broken skin dotting it. John walked in softly, feet not actually brushing the carpet, using the breeze to muffle his steps. Sollux's bangs shifted and curled around his face, touching his cheeks. “Go away Egbert. I am buthy.”

 

“Sure you are.” Walking over the rest of the way without tricks John reached out and settled his palms along the harsh lines of Sollux's shoulders. They were a framework of tension, wire, and bone. Like Karkat, Sollux ran mostly on adrenaline and anger more than any inward stock of fortitude. John wanted to ease all of it away, let Sollux sit effortlessly. Digging his thumbs carefully into the first junction of muscle he could find, he felt him wince. “Too much?”

 

“Mmm-mm. Keep doing that. Jutht gentler.” John adjusted his pressure accordingly and went about slowly ushering Sollux's anger away by way of fingers and body-warmth. Fifteen minutes later the dual-horned troll was slumped forward in his chair, head dipped down and the line of his neck exposed. John adjusted himself and cupped his hands along the line of Sollux's neck, working it, easing up to his scalp and smoothing around the base of his horns. “Nnnnnggghhh.” Sollux folded his arms and cupped his head in them, position indicating utter surrender. .

 

John paused, bringing his hands up. “Too much? Does that hurt?” Karkat was strange about his horns. Further investigation had informed him that they were sensitive to electromagnetic fields in varying degrees, and depending on the hemo-type of the troll in question there were nerves involved in the horn structure. John had always assumed they were more like a ram or deer horn in nature and meant to accept impact, not sensing organs.

 

Sollux shook his head, a micro-movement. “'th jutht enough. Feelth nice,” his voice was a whisper, overlaid with an inhuman noise, something sort of timorous vibrating behind the spoken words. John paused only a breath before circumnavigating the chair and folding down along the line of Sollux's back, hand braced on the desk so that the was not squishing his friend. Resting his face against the curve of Sollux's shoulder and neck he made his offer quietly. “Come back with me for a little. I'll give you a better massage, we'll have some tea.” There was the possibility of a pile, but it might be too forward. Truthfully, he was unsure of what made an acceptable pile. Or how one went about becoming an actual moirail for that matter. It was also an active effort not to giggle. Invading someone's space without retribution almost felt too intimate, like he was playing a part in a movie, being the dashing suitor.

 

Sollux laid unresponsive a few beats before slowly rising, the backward pressure notifying John to get off. Rising as well, John gave his shoulder another squeeze. “Head to my room okay? It's gonna be the room directly down the hall when you take a right turn out of this room. It'll be the second one down on the right side of the hallway. You'll be in the bathroom if you take a wrong turn.” Snorting, the gold-blooded boy smacked him on the chest and nodded, navigating out of the room quietly.

 

* * *

 

The best way to get his glowing-beau to relax was to start with palms and wrists with soft pressure. This served the dual purpose of easing the tension out of Sollux's oft-busy hands and occupying them so that he could not compulsively type. Half in jest, John had laid down the 'no texting during tlc' rule and Sollux honored their agreement, typing psychically on his pda, rather than using his digits. As it was obviously a coping mechanism of some sort, that was good enough. He would sit and work on Sollux's hands and arms until the tapping sounds died away and he settled down on the bed, curled around the pillows that John had provided for his eventual collapse. In their combined efforts they had managed to find the code for a halfway workable sopor.

 

In addition to giving the trolls adequate sleeping arrangements in the house it also left room for experimentation. Alchemizing bedding and sopor together provided sleeping materials that let both of his trolls doze comfortably in his bed. While it was not a workable solution for the night terrors that arose from non-chemical sedation, it did provide a quiet space to be still in.

 

A few weeks into their quiet time John banned digital devices from the room. It could be a space just for rest, where the game, their fate, imps, nothing at all was allowed to come in. Even though it was an artificial haven, John liked the idea of a safe space, when everything around them was so very unsafe.

 

Curled up in a tangle of sharp elbows and knees, blankets, and pillows, John lay parallel to Sollux, one hand quietly resting on his neck and a forefinger traveling along the line of his jaw. “Pale for you, you know.”

 

Sollux turned his face quietly, resting his cheek in the palm of John's hand. “'m not thtupid.” A sunshine-tinted blush colored his cheeks. “I jutht don't get it. Tho I didn't thay anything. 'cuz I like being pampered.” Nuzzling slightly, he continued. “I didn't want it to turn out to be a joke.”

 

John slipped forward, reaching out and gathering the more slender troll close, shuffling around until they were comfortably entwined. Their difference in height meant that John fit into the curve of Sollux's body comfortably, and he could quite feasibly make a fine 'small spoon'. “I told you a while ago. My Dad raised a gentleman. I like to play jokes, but I never lie about stuff that would really hurt someone. I like you so much. I want to make you smile. You already make me smile without even trying.” Derisive and amused, Sollux shook his head. “'m not a good palemate for you. And you don't need to be placated. You have Dave.”

 

John brushed a hand through his hair, enjoying the not-quite-soft slickness of it, flirting with the edges of his horns without touching them. “Maybe I like being the hands that are held out to yours. Sometimes watching you, it seems like you're slowly drowning. I'm your lifeguard. I'll always pull you up. KK may be there to check your shit when you get out of hand, but I'm here to put you back on balance. You fit good between us, and I fit good in-between you two. What do you say, you wanna give this diamond thing a try?”

 

Sollux slid a hand up the back of John's shirt, fingers gently sliding over the soft ridges of his spine. “Dunno. It'th complicated.”

 

John wormed in as flush as possible, going with his instincts and trying to project comfort. “What is it that has you all nervous? You can say no if you want. I won't be mad.”

 

Lips settled on his lips. A firm, soft, warm pressure that was one of his favorite things in the world. Initially not questioning this development John leaned in until his brain caught up with his body. Pulling back a hair he bonked his forehead against Sollux's, a gesture reminiscent of him and Karkat. “Oh. That is complicated. Are you looking for a matespirit? I kinda thought-”

 

“No. 'm not. I have Dave and Terezi for that.”

 

John cupped the back of Sollux's head in his hand and smiled as the troll mirrored the gesture. “Then what? Talk to me. That's what your diamond is supposed to be for, right?”

 

“'th....you and KK are a thet. A red and blue thet. Dave and Terezi are also a red and blue thet. You and KK... you're the more thane thet but I want both. I like... all of the connections and interactionth. When I want to fight and be silly, they're there for me. You and KK different part of the quadrant. I like the idea of you ath my diamond. I never imagined that I would have a human there. I always thought that it would be AA, or maybe Fef.”

 

John traced one of Sollux's smaller horns slowly, enjoying the odd texture. “I know they were dear to you. Karkat told me a bit.”

 

Sollux nodded. “Aradia,” his voice caught just slightly, John had been around long enough to detect the change of pitch, “Aradia wath kind of my matethpirit when we were wigglerth. I think thhe would have been my morail, if thingth were different. And Fef....wath really thpecial. Thhe wath really... warm and bright. We adventured together a lot in our game.” John nodded, surprised and pleased that Sollux was willing to be so candid with him. “Thanks... for being willing to tell me about them. I know that it's hard thinking about people that have passed...”

 

Sollux carded his fingers through John's hair. “You're a bit thpoiled. You haven't lotht your friendth.”

 

Having the grace to look abashed even when he did not necessarily feel sorry that none of his friends were dead, John found a good compromise of an answer. “I know. I intend to keep it that way too. And while I'm at it, I'll just adore you and the rest of the kids that much extra for your friends that aren't here. Sound like a good deal?”

 

Sollux rolled his shoulders, stealing John's mouth away again. Settling into the gesture John wondered why he did not feel any sort of guilt or confusion. This was not Karkat but it felt natural and easy. When Sollux's tongue passed the gateway of his lips he sighed happily. French kissing was the best thing that ever had happened to him post-game, even if it was a little pointy and dangerous and also moist. Sollux spoke again, but it felt too close, almost like lips were directly against his ear, and it summoned goosebumps over John's arms. There was no way that there should be a voice that he could hear when their mouths were busy.

 

'it's complicated because I want to touch you. And I want to hold you. I want to see what you look like without your clothes on. And that is decidedly not normal pale behavior. But I am not normal. I like kissing humans and I can't settle on just one person. I like the fact that there are sets of you. It's perfect. This is perfect, and you and KK and Dave and Terezi are all perfect. Red and blue and red and blue. KK's eyes are red and yours are blue. You two taste just right. Hot and cool. So I don't know if we're allowed to be pale and kiss. If we can do that, I want to be your diamond. I want it a lot.'

 

Inching back and kissing Sollux's nose, John let the first thing to come to mind out of his mouth. “When you talked just now...you weren't all lispy. What just happened? How did you talk when you couldn't talk?” The conversation-provoking statements were nothing to the awesome fact of wordless communication!

 

Sollux's expression blossomed into into a radiant and slightly mocking smile. “Think about it a little bit. My world is characterithed by brainth. There'th thort of a mind motif going.”

 

John could not contain his excitement. “You were thinking in my head. And I could hear you! That's so cool!”

 

Kissing him again softly, Sollux nodded. “It'th cool becauthe it'th thafe. You're thafe. When I touch you I don't hear you crying, or thcreaming. I jutht hear the wind. I hear the wind and I know that at leatht for now you're not a liar. You theem to mean it when you thay that for thome reathon you think I'm worthwhile.”

 

“Because you are.” Sollux wrinkled his nose at him but did not directly contradict his statement.

 

“Tho John. We need to addreth thith. Ith KK okay with uth being thexual? I don't have thith dance of permithionth with my other blueberry and raspberry pair, but it'th a different thing.” Smiling at a private joke, Sollux stroked a hand along the line of John's side and he felt blood rushing up to his face. No longer a virgin, it was very different being touched by someone who was not Karkat. Where there was an easy, warm familiarity when they touched one another, every small motion that Sollux made jangled along his spine and hiked his heart-rate.

 

“Karkat said he was okay with us being pale. I don't know if that was blanket permission to have sex. I'm... okay with it. I feel like... this is different from my flushed relationship. We're kind of like... a sexy diamond? Is there such a thing? Pink diamonds?”

 

Sollux dipped an inquisitive finger under the waistband of John's pants, toying with the elastic on the boxers he encountered. “Thome moirail thetth are thexual. The releathe and intimacy breedth calm and peace.”

 

John grinned awkwardly. “I have to tell you that right now you touching me is not breeding peace in my soul.”

 

Shifting so that the warm coil of his buldge bumped against John's hip, Sollux gave him a pointed look. Watching the subtle shift and curl of the appendage under the fabric of Sollux's pants, John felt keenly aware of his growing erection. This situation was sweet, confusing and very exciting. “Ahhh... until I get the okay for pants-off from my lovely little Hermit Crab, I am thinking pants need to stay on.”

 

Sighing, but nodding Sollux turned over, making as if he was ready to go. John caught him around the waist, pulling him flush along his front. “But,” he whispered. “I don't think he'd have any problems with some mutual touching.” Sollux leaned forward and bit his lip. “Thate your termth and conditionth for thith encounter, Mr Egbert.”

 

Smarting from the nip, but glad that he had not offended Sollux, John carefully removing his glasses and settled them on a nightstand. Sliding a hand along the plane of Sollux's chest, John offered up his terms. “If you start to feel uncomfortable, at any time, tell me to stop and we stop. Until we've talked to Karkat, I think penetrative sex is a no. And please, please tell me exactly what it is that I should be doing to make you come so hard that your ears ring.” Flushing to the tips of his ears, John felt proud at how confidant his voice sounded.

 

Licking his lips Sollux smirked. “Thut up and touch me Egbert. You babble.”

 

John popped the button to Sollux's pants and watched the material of his boxers tent up with the motion of the newly-freed bulge. It was slightly mesmerizing. “I want... to put you in my mouth.”

 

“I think that is a thplendid idea. But a better one? I want you to get thethe boxerth off of me.” Hooking his fingers into the waistband of said garment John guided them down and to the side, leaving pants and slightly wet underwear in a little pile off to the side of the bed. Sollux smiled, thin like a wire and powerful, exuding comfort and excitement. “Ith it okay if you unbutton your fly? No thex... but.... I want to feel your thkin.” Reaching out to John, Sollux tugged at his shirt and John shimmied out of it, sending it down to join the pants. Fumbling with his pants a moment he got his fly and the button on his boxers undone, setting himself free to the air. He was so aroused that he was flushed a deep reddish-brown, in contrast with the sienna of the rest of his skin. Precum glittered at the head and he had a hard time keeping his mind away from what it would be like to settle into the slick space between Sollux's thighs. Shuddering as Sollux grazed hand over him, he smiled, leaning in and kissing his cheek. “What now handsome?”

 

“Lay back.”

 

Confused but compliant, John did so, watching as Sollux carefully straddled his waist, bulge waving and gently exploring, seeking out a point of entry or a source of contact and heat. Scooting forward until they were hip to hip, Sollux sighed contentedly and John curled his fingers into the sheets, hissing in pleasure. Having found the warmest plane of skin available, the bulge curled itself around John, encasing him in a soft grip. Grinding forward, Sollux made a soft, high sound, coming forward to settle on John's chest and bite at his mouth. “Jutht like that...” Pushing his hips back in a counterpoint to the steadily increasing rocks of Sollux's hips, John palmed his modest backside firmly, insisting on keeping the proximity between them close.

 

It was not anything to write love-poetry about. The mutual-attraction and anticipation led John to a quick finish, with his abdomen sticky and slick. Focusing his attention blearily on Sollux he watched as the taller troll rocked and ground against his hips, bulge still gently squeezing his settling genitals. A long swath of moisture decorated John's abdomen and his pants were a lost cause. Rocking Sollux's hips with his hands, following the tempo that the troll had set, John watched the expressions cross his face as his breath hitched and skipped in time with his movements. “How do I help?”

 

“Mmm. Fingerth in. Hook 'em toward the front.”

 

Easing a hand down between them and trying not to get in the way, John did as he was asked, slipping middle and forefingers in carefully. Having been intimate with Karkat he was expecting the moving mini-structures that greeted him, and he pushed at them gently. Sollux groaned deeply, reaching down to absently pump his bulge.

“hmmm... preth... down... a litt-nn there. Yeah.”

 

The urgency of Sollux's movements increased, his breath growing shallower an quicker. “Mmmmng... bucket. Pleath.”

 

Decapatchalouging a bucket quickly John helped Sollux ease up to his knees, still making come-hither gestures inside of him, enjoying the close-up view. “C'mon. You're gorgeous. Almost there. I'm going to watch you and it's gonna be great. Fill it up.”

 

Sollux swatted at him, cheeks burning. “Not allowed to talk dirty at me like that. KK taught you filthy thingth.” John felt a little silly honestly, but he could see the subtle jerk that twitched through Sollux at the phrase and his hand tighten on his bulge. It had been worth a try. Balancing against John, bucket settled between his knees, Sollux shivered, stroking fast, forehead on his shoulder. “M-move your fin-gerth.. Jutht a little...OHYEAH.”

 

John smiled awkwardly, watching the orgasm wash over Sollux, holding him as muscles contracted and he shook. The only thing that he could even vaguely compare the sensation to was the first time he enjoyed a prostate-stimulated orgasm and it probably was not anywhere near the same. Trading little kisses back and forth, John gently pushed and worked his fingers as yellow fluid dripped and settled down along his wrist and into the receptacle below. Finished and trembling Sollux carefully took the bucket, filed it and flopped down on his side, a hand thrown over John's chest. Laying still, they enjoyed the quiet sounds of the house, not in any hurry to move. Taking Sollux's hand, John kissed his palm. “Pink diamond. Definitely.” If Karkat was okay with it, this was the way that they would balance one another. “How you doing?”

 

Papping John gently in the face, Sollux smiled. “Fine.”

 

Bestirring himself carefully and wiping his stomach off with is shirt, adding it to the laundry pile along with his very damp pants, John scooped Sollux up like the stick-prince that he was. “C'mon. Let's go get cleaned up. The water's comfy.”

 

* * *

 

Leaning against Sollux's chest, water beating down along his back, John felt sublime. Glancing up at the blurry mess of troll floating somewhere above his head he offered a grin. “We still okay?” Leaning down and kissing John quietly on the forehead, Sollux nodded, arms tightening where they were settled around his shoulders. Karkat was stripping down just outside of the shower, having been apprised of the situation upon his entrance to the bathroom.

 

The door opened and shut and John oofed quietly as the solid weight of Karkat settled against his back. “Is it John-sandwich time?”

 

Sollux flashed him a grin and shook his head. “My thighth are thtill thhakey. Gimme a thec.”

 

Karkat settled his chin on John's shoulder. “So we're having a shower-jam.”

 

John grinned a bit, settled comfortably between his two favorite trolls. “Lay your feelings on me captain, my body is ready.”

 

“You two think you'll be having sex frequently?”

“Thometimeth. John maketh me feel very... thettled.”

 

“Doesn't he just? Well... that's okay. It wouldn't be okay if you weren't in-clade with me. But...I'm okay with you two doing that as long as we don't vacillate, okay?”

 

“Thtill pitch ath the night for you.”

 

“Still love your face.”

 

“And how do you feel about one-another?”

  
“Super-pale.”

 

“Like I love hith handth. And pale. Thooooo pale.” Grinning, Sollux stretched his arms out to catch both of them, hovering like a skeletal tree. “Thith here... thith is good. Let'th keep thith.”

 

Karkat settled his arms across John, squishing him between the pair of them. “Good enough for me. We'll see if we can make it work. Let's not linger in here forever, though. I brought up tea, and it has honey drops. Sollux I may or may not have remembered to put any in yours. And I don't remember which cup is which.”

 

Bouncing out of the shower, Soullux fumbled a towel around his waist and headed out into John's room, leaving the pair of them in the steam together. Turning in Karkat's arms, John looked at him. “You didn't forget, did you?”

 

“Nope.”

 

John leaned in and kissed Karkat deeply. He was lucky. He was lucky to be safe and have his family and good lovers who loved one another. It wouldn't be perfect as they went forward, and as the year progressed, things were starting to become a little more ominous. Still, they would make it work, they had to.

 

Something this good was not meant to be broken.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you feel better Mr. J! <3


End file.
